Just your everyday struggling actor

Anonymous asked: Anything useful?

useful response.

San Fransisco

This was our first proper day in San Fran, and it was set to be a good one. As the holiday is slowly coming to its conclusion, weve decided to keep fairly loose on when to get up and whatnot. It was about 10:30 before we rolled out of the Raddison down at the Fishermans Wharf. The number one thing that dad had to do before we left the country behind was see Alcatraz prison, so we walked along the pier on one of the loveliest days that we have had the entire holiday. We didnt even need jackets! It was a real godsend to not have to rug up in a heap of layers. We could see the sun! It was in this state of absolute amazement at all the colour that Dad and I made our way to pier 33, the one wharf where boats to Alcatraz went from.

We quickly got on the boat from buying the tickets, and before you could say lickitysplit we were out onto the biggest natural bay in the world. The hustle and bustle of the city quickly melted away to be replaced by the calm of the water, blue as anything you could think of. Alcatraz was a fair bit out into the bay, but it wasnt long before we were pulling up to the infamous prison. Filing out of the boat with our best cattle impersonations, we walked out onto the dock, the imposing prison house dwarfing us. We were stopped for a compulsory safety speech by the local ranger, advising us on the various do’s and dont’s of the island. Many sections of the island were closed to the public, due to various dangers, so he explained the places we could and couldnt go. I wasnt listening too greatly to most of it, I was too busy admiring this man’s exemplary beard. It was enormous! his speech ending, Dad and I waited behind a bit to let the rush of the crowd go by. We walked into the gift shop for a bit, to get one of the better maps. I walked out with a genuine Alcatraz Harmonica. Just a bit awesome. USC kids reading this, expect to be regaled with a whole load of th best harmonica youve ever heard when im back.

With the crush gone, we made our way out into the place properly. The prison was at the top of a fairly large hill, so we took our time. The most damning thing about Alcatraz was that it was situated in such a beautiful spot! Everyday the prisoners were faced with one of the greatest views of the skyline of San Fransisco, only a mile and a half away, and they couldnt reach it. Only a lovely clear day like today, it would have been torture to see this sight, but it was utterly delightful for us. The top of the hill offered the best views, coincidentally where the prison actually was. We made our way in after drinking in the views, to take part in the audio tour.

The imposing grey cement walls were in stark contrast to the lush views of outside. Everything was just so depressing. The audio tour was a recording that brought you all around the prison, as spoken by former officers and inmates at the facility. The recordings told tales of some of the more famous occupants of these cells, such as Al Capone and ‘The Birdman’. This place was created to hold some of societies worst, and the level of security was set to hold anything in forever. There was still many who tried to escape, the tantalizing views of the skyline not far from their reach becoming too much for their minds. Many tried, but only 3 ever escaped, tunneling for a year at the back of their cells with broken spoons and escaping through the roof. The three are still considering fugitives and have never been caught.

After bringing us around every cell block, guard office and dining hall in the prison house, the tour finally ended, and it was definitely well worth the fee. After buying a few more things from the gift shop, we made our way back outside into the sunshine. We walked back to the dock slowly, checking out a few more signs along the way. While prisoners were still here, they were put to work making the island properly habitable, including placing plants around the place, and they did a fine job of it. The plants were thriving like mad in the lovely conditions of the island, another stark contrast to the grey and cement of the rest of the island. We had finally exhausted all there was to do on the island, so we made our way back to the dock and just caught a boat before it pulled out.

After landing on San Fransisco again, we stopped for a quick drink before setting off back into the city again. Passing a tram car parked, we hopped on and paid the fare, thinking to just sit on the car till the end of the line. The cable car trundled and shaked up and down the many hills of the city, uncomfortable and slow. Despite this, it was one of the greater experiences of the entire city. The unique position of the car allowed for some of the greatest views down the streets of the city, the open air style allowing us to take in the full experience of San Fransisco. All good things must come to an end though, so we got off at the end of the line. Having absolutely no plan in mind, we walked aimlessly for a while, finally stopping in a useful cafe for a quick kip. Having no clue what to do, we walked aimlessly some more before stopping at a steak place for some dinner. The place looked slightly dodgy, but had some delicious steaks. It was getting late and we were tired, so we grabbed a passing cable car and trundled back to the hotel for sleep time.

Washington weve had a small disaster. Dad has taken over the cold that ive had since the second day of New York…………….on another note, im feeling much better! It took a little convincing to get out of bed, but eventually we made our way out into a slightly warmer day in Washington DC. We had made plans the night before to meet up with Sam Blagg again at the Washington Monument, so we made our way down the familiar streets. It was a bit of a walk, slightly than we had realised, so we were slightly late, but Sam wasnt too pertubed. The National Mall today was thronging with people, all bearing signs. Upon closer inspection we saw that the signs bore slogans calling for the ban of abortions in America. We thought back to a few days ago, when we were told out the front of the supreme court of the impending protests on this exact issue. Slightly scared, we made our way towards the lincoln memorial off in the distance, our eyes wary for any conflicts, just in case. The Lincoln memorial seemed quite close, but the walk seemed to never end. The first stop on our way to the lincoln memorial was the WWII memorial. Because of the cold, the magnificent fountain that usually sprays across the entire length of the memorial had been shut down, which was a shame, but the sight of the frozen pool reaching all the way to the Lincoln Memorial was a sight in itself. Walking under gnarled trees that I imagine would be wonderful in the spring, we eventually made it to the actual memorial. Walking up the huge flight of steps, we saw the big man himself chilling on his comfy looking seat. The walls were inscribed with some of Lincolns more memorable speeches, as well as some quite interesting old style art. The Memorial went from fairly empty to packed within minutes of us getting there, loads of school buses pulling up to bolster the ranks of the protestors. Deciding that it was starting to get a little hairy, we made our way off the national mall and snagged a passing cab. Sam had reccomended a very nice hotel for lunch, so we headed down that way. After a very nice lunch (Burgers again) we made our way out of the hotel and thought about our next stop. Finally, dad had had enough. His cold was flaring up something horrible, so he opted to go back to the hotel. Sam and I decided to make our way back to the smithsonian museums to check out the museum of natural history. We found our way to the subway station. It was slightly hard actually buying a proper ticket, as the minimum you could put on a card was $10. Thinking we might use the subway a bit tomorrow, i bought a ticket for dad as well. After a brief 15 minute wait, a train that went by the national mall came by, so we hopped on quick. As with the Lincoln Memorial, the train went from empty to full within minutes with all the protestors, but luckily the stop wasnt far. Making our way out into the sunlight once again, we made our way through the crowds and walked to the museum. The museum was one of the better museums ive ever been to, with loads and loads to see and do. The museum touched on everything from dinosaurs to marine life, so we had plenty to look at. The highlight would have to have been when I was looking in the aquarium and spotted a clown fish and one of those tall blue and black fish, reminiscent of Nemo and Dory. Of course, within seconds of having that thought, 3 kids came up, completely unrelated, and said ” LOOK MUMMY THERES DORY AND NEMO! DORY AND NEEEMMOOO!!!”.I dont think those fish will ever be known by their original names ever again. With the museum eventually exhausted, we made our way back out into the Mall again. The protest was still in full swing, so we got outta dodge quick. The next few hours were spent randomly wandering from place to place. I had forgotten briefly that Sam was still not that familiar with the city, so I walked on confident that he knew where we were. That didnt go too well. We eventually had to stop when we hit china town and find a map to get back to my hotel. Sitting in the hotel lobby, we talked for a while until his parents turned up. We said our goodbyes and he drove off. It was a real pleasure to catch up with Sam and I definitely hope to see him again in the future! Making my way up to the hotel, I settled in for an early night.

Deciding it was a good idea to stick to the recent trend of early mornings so that could actually get shit done, we woke up at the early hour of 8:30 once again to the sounds of howling winds, but we were ever hopeful for a wonderful day. As we had unbeknownst to us walked straight past the White House the day before without actually stopping to take a look, we decided to head that way. The surrounding area was absolutely crawling with Secret Police, dilligentely trying their hardest to conceal to conceal themselves and failing miserably. As we were walking along we were passed by a person going for a brisk morning run. There was two poeple who were keeping at a quite close proximity to this lady. Upon closer inspection of the two people, we noticed quite thick loopy wires coming out of the two runners ears. Completely unknown to us, we had been passed by one of the American VIP’s! With that thought, we made our way round to the front of the White House to see if maybe we could see the biggest VIP of them all.

The White House was an impressive sight to see. High sweeping neo grecian balconies made the stately house even more imposing and regal. Sadly, we didnt get a glimpse of the big man himself, neither of any of the house. The entire grounds was hemmed in by a great big spiked gate. Coupled with the major security and this place was a veritable fortress. There was an information thingomabob that had information about the gardens surrounding the house. I laughed at the quote that one of the first presidents said about this particular garden. “And lo, I shall create a garden more for the public than myself”. Well, your ancestors seem to have forgotten that, whoever you are. If I had even thought about stepping into that garden I would have been shot pretty quickly.

The day before we had been recommended the national spy museum, so we decided that was the place to check out today. It was a bit of a walk, but we eventually made it. We paid our $18 and made our way into the museum. It was quite a well made museum, stretching for quite a long way. It covered spying through the centuries, from the usual cloak and dagger cold war spying you here a lot about, the ninjas of the old japanese dynasties, to the cutting edge computer espionage of today. It was quite enlightening, and time consuming. It was a good 3-4 hours before we actually made it out of the place. We had made preperations to visit Samuel Blagg during our trip to DC, so we hailed down a cab as we were walking out of the museum.

The Blaggs were set out quite far into the Washington DC suburbs, and a lovely suburb at that. Falls Church is quite a great place, the headquarters of JAG (great show). We ate a very nice dinner, and chinwagged about the state of affairs in Australia and America, followed by some card games. Sam and I made plans to meet up again the next day so he could show us around Washington properly. It seems Sam is quite missing everyone back at USC, but he’s enjoying himself here in America as well. He really has the coolest writing desk you have ever seen. If you know Sam, you sir/madam are awesome :D Especially since they gave us a ride back to our motel, a fair drive at that. Seeing as it had gone fairly late at that point, we headed for bed.

Washington Day 1

The night before had been one of the earlier nights of the holiday so far, about 8:30pm or so. The events of the last week had all caught up on one night, and we were only too happy to oblige the need for sleep, and plenty of it. It was a tired pair who woke up at the late hour of 10:30 to the freezing cold city of Washington DC, the countries capital and political centre. We were in the same state as some of the countries greatest political minds, including the head honcho himself. It was almost 11am before we worked up the courage to walk out into the -2 degree day, the padding on thick today. Having asked the concierge the quickest way to the smithsonian museums, we headed down the fastest street. The walk was far, but with our backs bent into the wind and the cold we eventually made it to the Washington Monument, a bigger phallic symbol of power I have never seen. After taking a few pictures, we kept walking on. The city is not as easy to navigate as NYC, so we quickly realised we had walked straight past the smithsonian. Walking back, we exchanged a few dollars for a map of the city from a friendly man who was collecting for the homeless and made our way into the smithsonian information centre to get away from the cold for a bit, the warmth and smell of the cafe calling to our empty stomachs.

The cafe was one of your “serve yourself you lazy bum’ affairs. After grabbing an over priced coffee and cake, we sat at a table and rested for a bit. Feeling quenched, we made our way back out into the cold and walked down to the Smithsonian Air and Space museum, the main attraction for Dad. This museum was unlike anything you have ever seen, stuffed to the brim with the aeronautical marvels of the past few centuries. Everything from the actual first Wright brothers glider, the WWII bombers to the latest and greatest unmanned planes.The museum also held some of the original space shuttles, as well as replicas of some of the most destructive nuclear devices ever created, both of Soviet and USA construction, thankfully disabled. Once we had browsed all the marvels that this one museum could offer (of a total 13 museums) we made our way once again back out into the cold and towards the Capitol building. The front steps of the Capitol building held one of the greatest views, all the way down the mall of the Smithsonian. Its something you have to see.

Deciding it was probably time to actually go inside the Capitol building we starting walking around to the other side of the Capitol building, where the Capitol visitors centre is. There was some pretty interesting stuff in there, like a replica of the American Constitution. Unfortunately, we were kicked out pretty quickly do to the museum closing at 4:30, so we didnt get to see everything. We walked up near the Supreme Court as we saw some people standing around there. Apparentely today was the anniversary of the supreme court decision to legalise abortion. On this day, people for and against this revolutionary medical procedure. Those against abortion were standing at the bottom of the stairs and tape across their mouths. Those for Abortion were handing out pamphlets explaining the pros. We stopped and had a talk with a lovely lady named Ashley, one of the pro abortion people. She told us a lot about the current political climate of America. Before we left, she gave us a card. Seeing as it was getting very cold, we headed back to the hotel and ate in for the night.

Blog post

Last proper day of New York


After the hard walk of yesterday, a sleep in was definitely in order. About 11am we made our way out, the streets still bustling just as we had left it. The bracing cold we had experienced the past few days had subsided a little, still slightly nippy, but as with most things we had quickly become quite used to it. In the interest of prudence, we decided that a quick trip the Penn Station on 43th street was in order, the place where we would depart from to Washington the next morning. It was quite convenient, only being one street away. Weve found that the hotel that we stayed at, the New Yorker, was actually quite convenient, being quite close to a whole load of main sights and destinations around the city. The Empire State building was only a few blocks away, the main shopping district of Soho only being a few blocks more. Times Square was also only a block away, and with that thought in our minds we set out from Penn Station down 7th avenue towards Times Square.

The start of Times Square was on 42nd street, so only a short walk, but as always foot traffic was heavy around this area. About a half hour later, with a short food break in the middle, we made it to Times Square. It was the middle of the day, but the lights were still almost blinding, advertising everything from Dunkin’ Donuts to Mint icecream flavoured gum. I spotted the ever familiar toys r’ us symbol on one of the buildings, and gawked at the size of the building. I pointed out the building to Dad, and within minutes were were both in the building with wide eyes full of merriment. This place had a freaking FERRIS WHEEL inside it! We went from floor to floor, checking out the different toys that you couldnt find in Australia. A person was hawking their companies helicopter which was easily controlled by a controller that fit in the palm of the hand. Before I knew it, dad had one in his hand and had bought it.  As i rolled my eyes and turned away, i spotted another man who was hawking a ufo that seemed to spin in midair between his hands without any aid by him. Before I knew it I had one in my hand and had bought it………………….I really showed Dad didnt I?…………

After checking out every floor of this mega toystore, we made our way back out into the cold and the sleet to see some more of Times Square. There were many signs and people advertising all new Broadway plays, and we perused them all, but one stood out more than the others. There was a sign that showed a large image of Spiderman with the title “Spiderman-Turn Off the Dark” standing in plain view of everyone. The idea enticed me instantly. I would never have thought of Spiderman as a musical, but  it would make for an interesting experience. We went into the times square info centre and bought tickets before they sold out. With that to look forward to later, we made our way towards a distant patch of trees that looked inviting. We were heading towards Central Park.

Being the middle of winter, and a particularly heavy winter at that, the trees were all completely barren of leaves, but not of life. Every once in a while you could spot the flash of eyes and bushy tails of the parks native squirrels, who every once in a while would stop in their tracks and seemingly pose for the numerous cameras that were pointed their way by the smiling tourists. There was quite a lot of poeple in the park at the time, but just looking around you wouldnt know it. Every direction you looked you would spot at least 3-5 people. The park was so big that you quickly forgot this, believing to be quite alone in this peaceful and wonderful park. The Chess and Checkers tables that dotted the park were empty, the usual occupants of these places moving inside for the winter. The small lake that usually sat just off the centre of the park had frozen over, people young and old skating the ice. Children were taking their first ice skating steps, adults were taking advantage of the icey conditions to take their significant other out for a romantic date, others wizzing around the ice as if they could skate before they could walk. One man in particular, who looked about 70 or so, was absolutely rocketing around this rink, his hands nonchalantaly in his pockets as he sped around people as if they were standing still. Both Dad and I just sat and stared at this wonderful sight for a while, sitting down at one of the many benches that dotted the hills for a well deserved break.

deciding that we had sat on our arses for long enough, we made the walk further into the park. The pathways had mercifully been cleared of snow, the odd left over patch sending both of us into careening almost falls. The practised natives walked past us, tromping through the snow in their snow boots.  The strains of a saxaphone carried far through the park, one of the few buskers that had braved the cold so that he could play. Thinking he deserved it just for that, I gave him a dollar. Horse drawn carriages made their way around the many pathways of the park as well, but not too many people were riding today. checking the time, we thought it wise to make our way back to the hotel for a quick rest before the show started.

6:30 came around, an hour and a half before the show started. We dressed in our suits of padding once again and headed out into the snow. A store along the way was selling Converse Chuck Taylors for $35, so I snagged a pair quick. Yet another example of the cheap American clothing. I quickly ran back to the hotel and dropped the shoes off, as it was only a two minute walk away, and then we walked on further to the theatre. Still in a slight daze from our rest, it was about five minutes later that we realised we had walked 3 streets further than the theatre, and were also a a whole avenue off. Changing our course, we quickly made it to the theatre.

The theatre had only just opened its doors when we walked up, so it was not long before we were sitting in our seats. There was a family sitting next to us, and dad started speaking to them. It took a while before he realised that only one of them spoke any english, being the ten year old girl who was next to him. They had a good old chinwag while I had a look through the playbill. Looking forward, Dad realised that the big fat man sitting in front of him was blocking his view completely, so he went back and got a second cushion, something that is generally reserved for children. A half hours wait and then the show started! and what a cool show it was.

Spiderman the musical was unlike anything I have ever seen. All of the onstage props and furniture had been made up to look like how they would in the 2D comics, the fight scenes choreographed with your usual BAM’s and ZOWs and slow motion. The wall crawling and web swinging was done by a series of wires that went all over the theatre, allowing Spiderman and any other flying character to make their way to any point of the theatre, even partway into the audience! The intracacy of these moments were astounding, especially the great aerial battle between Spiderman and the Green Goblin. One wire going the wrong way and the entire thing would have gone haywire! The musical numbers were something to witness, the dancing a treat. The story was your usual fare, the life of Peter Parker and his fabulous transformation into Spiderman, and his fight with the Green Goblin, his first big battle. The musical also follows some other storylines, that I shall leave out just in case it should ever make its way to Adelaide. All I can say is that if it does go to Adelaide, go see it, immediately. It would have to be one of the best musicals I have ever seen!

Once the musical had finished, the crush of people to get out had subsided and and Dad had said goodbye to his new 10 year old Brazilian friend, we made our way out of the theatre. I bought a windowcard for the play on the way out, as a keepsake for later years. It was 11:10 at this point, so eating a nice sit down meal would have been quite impossible. We decided to do the most New Yorkean thing to commemorate our last night in NY and grab a slice or two at the pizza place around the corner. We were standing outside in the middle of the night, with two massive slices of pizza each, eating at a standing table and enjoying the cool breeze.

Thats New York in a nutshell. Its the little traditions that really make up the place. Whilst the place is a constant hustle and bustle of people and taxis, there is always a place to stop and think for a while, and have a nice cup of joe while youre at it. Theres always something new and interesting happening, a new play or musical to see. Its almost impossible to get lost in this city, but if you ever do you know youve had yourself a wonderful time. The buildings are a perfect mix of the old and the new, the various districts throwing their own flavour into the mix. The tall buildings give way to the open parks, each teeming with their own wildlife. New York is what you make it. If you love the thrill of the crowds, of moving forward and always forward, then New York is the place for you. If you yearn for the more slow paced lifestyle, there is plenty of places to stretch your legs and relax. And that was New York.

20/01/2011

Day 2 in new York

the day started like any other, with the crust on my eyes cracking as I opened my eyes in a new city. It was about 9am, and I was still tired. I tell ya, this jetlag is going to kill me before the end of the holiday. Dad was quickly awakened by the sound of the door knocking and a little old lady saying “housekeeepping”. In our daze we had forgotten to put the do not disturb sign the night before. After shooing the lady away we dressed in our suits of padding and made our way out into the balmy 2 degree New york day. There is absolutely no way you can be instantly used to this kind of cool unless you experience it everyday. there was compacted snow lining every street, and the jackets were thick. The natives had a new reason to rush, the cold spurring them on to their destination faster. I believe some people were using that to their full advantage, with joggers wearing shorts and tshirts that wouldnt keep any warmth at all. Dad and I struck out in a random direction, determined to keep out of any structure. We were just going to do a little bit of a reconnaisence……….that went out the door.

Ending up near the Empire State Building, we got approached by a man offering tickets to the top of the building as well as a virtual tour of some of the bigger highlights of NY. Enticed by the idea of a quick route up to the top without waiting in a cue for an hour, we took up his offer. we went up 80 floors in two different elevators, eventually arriving at the online tour place. We waited in a line for about twenty minutes, finally arriving in the tour place. It was slighty uninspiring, one of your run of the mill flights over the virtual city with the chairs moving with the screen and all that. After that ordeal, we made our way up to the top floor for the main show.  What a show it was! the building offered 360 degree views to each corner of the entire city. Breathtaking view it was, something you couldnt describe with words. We were so high up im sure you would break your leg if you fell, as well as the rest of your body. Spotting the Statue of Liberty in the far off distance, we decided to strike out in that direction. There was even a convenientely placed road that made its way 3/4 of the way to it. We made our way to the bottom and started down the road. We didnt figure in the next bit.

As we walked down the streets of Manhattan, the districts peeled by one by one, time seeming to stretch out forever. Dad and I soldiered on remarkably, plodding along with tenacity. We walked through Soho, construction sites, the building of the new World Trade Center, and then suddenly we were there, at the end of the island. the time had flown by, suddenly 10am turning into 4:30pm. We saw the Statue of liberty in the distance, the proud old lady standing tall like she has for over 100 years. After taking in that amazing view, we turned around and started slowly making our way back the way we had come. We were in no rush, so we took our time, taking turns every once in a while so we could see the city for what it really is. Soon we were dreadfully lost.

Finding a street that at least looked partially  familiar, we struck our course down in that direction. We were very disoriented. We decided it was about due for a break, so we pulled into a very nice mexican resteraunt. the food was fantastic. We didnt exit that place till about 8:30, and thats when things started getting desperate. We were in a city we didnt know, tired out of our minds, and full from an amazing dinner. We scanned the skyline for the Empire State and made our way there, buying a few things at some of the shops along the way. We eventually made it to the Empire State building, so we made it back to the hotel from there. we turned in about 10pm, ready for a very long and peacful sleep.

Blog post

18/1/2011

last day in Vegas

today we decided to get up at a half decent hour this time, considering we had lost a whole bunch of time with our first day as well as the massive jetlag induced sleep from the night before. crawling out of bed at 9am, we quickly decided that the grand canyon was not going to happen. there was just WAY too much other much more interesting things to see around the city, and realistically we werent even going to see a huge chunk of that. It would require a 3 hour flight to the middle of nowhere, and once we had actually touched down, got ourselves all set up, stood on the edge of the giant hole in the ground and gone “wooowww” we would have been left bored for the rest of the 3 hours that was left. With drowzy, bloodshot eyes and smiles on our faces, we ventured out once again into the black hole that is Las Vegas.

Having not a clue what to get up to in this city, we decided to follow the same kind of formula as we had with the other day, so we made our way to the 1/2 price ticket place to see if we could get ourselves a deal. at this early hour, there was practically noone in the line, so we quickly got ourselves some cheap tickets to see Rita Rudner, a comedian who had made herself a permanent home on the strip. I had not a clue who this person was, but dad assured me she was great. I trusted him, so we went for that. having hours and hours before the show started, we decided to take a walk along the strip. the seats for the show were first come first serve, so we went for a walk along the strip towards the strip so that we could get ourselves some quality seats.

The first partygoers of the day were slowly cracking open their hotel room doors and making their way out onto the strip, so the crowd was starting to increase. The partygoers from the night before with their hangovers and empty pockets were quickly replaced by fresh faced gamblers, ready for a good time, which the casinos are only too happy to oblige, with the small issue of money being the only pitfall. the Venetian loomed itself ahead of us, and we entered, not noticing the sign that said “Grand Canal shoppes this way, Venetian that way”. We were going the right way, just a bit of a scenic route. I’m glad we took this particular scenic route though. We quickly found ourselves in a shopping mall, but unlike any other. The decor and surroundings hinted of the streets of Rome, right down to the fluted columns and the blue sky, an optical illusion making the painted on clouds on the ceiling almost seem to move. Row after row of designer shops called to one and all to empty their pockets, and many were obliging. This place even went to far as to have a minature grand canal right down the middle, right down to the gondola’s and the singing oarsmen. The vaulted ceilings and painted frescoes made for some great acoustics, so their voices rang far through the mall, quite a feat for such a gigantic mall. We stopped for a quick drink to rest up for a sec as well as to take it all in. We pulled in at a big restraunt right next to the canal and just sat for a while. We werent in any hurry to get anywhere, so we took our time.

After our respite had come to its natural conclusion, we made our way round some more shops, quickly getting lost. Our sense of direction completely skewed, we started taking random turns and exits to make our way to something that resembled the Venetian. We bought a few things along the way of course, including my late Christmas present from Dad. Capitalism and retail therapy leaving smiles on our faces, we made our way towards a distant sign for the Venetian.

We walked into the Box Offices of the Venetian and booked ourselves some pretty spectacular seats. Once again having hours to spare, we decided to make our way down to the newly built centre. We had walked past it a few times going from place to place, but had never actually been in there. This place was absolutely HUGE from what we had been told, stretching from the Monte Carlo to the Cosmopolitan. It had two main roads running into it, which stressed the absolutely enormity and overthetopness of this place. Thanks to Dad, we never made it.

We decided to see if we could find soem free Wi-Fi in the nearby Forum shops, a subset of Caesars Palace, which was not far from our exit from the Venetian. We walked in and instantly got some signal, so we got all our online affairs sorted out. Deciding that sitting on a seat in a massively impressive mall facebooking and blogging “VEGAS IS KEWL LAWLAWLAWL” was actually starting to get a bit sad, we packed up and walked around a bit. Thats when ‘the salesman’ struck.

Making our way upstairs to find a toilet, a beauty cream israelian man accosted Dad, making claims that he could make all of lifes beauty troubles go away. Dad was suckered in fast. My father has always been a man for lotions and potions, and the next hour was going to be a good one for the salesman. The man slathered my father with every cream under the sun, talking up every single one of them, and Dad soon bought some cream. And the salesman still wanted more! He quickly moved onto the specialist creams, and Dad obliged him as he slathered yet more cream onto him. I was sitting on the side, bored out of my mind, for ages. For being such a good sport, the man gave me a ‘free’ gift for being such a good sport while dad was getting all this. Walking away with lightened pockets, we made a quick exit before dad could buy more.

Walking back along the strip, we slowly made some more progress towards the city centre. In the crush of the crowd, we somehow forgot our destination, and walking past our hotel, Ballys, Dad called for a rest stop. We went back up to our room and dad conked out for a half hour while I played with my new toy (A pair of Beat headphones) Dad also decided it was high time to confirm all the various paperwork for the next few days worth of travel, so there went an hour. We eventually remembered what we were going to do, but we had little time before the show started! We made our way back into the world again and settled down in a vietnamese/thai restraunt called Sea, having one of the better meals we had had in America so far. If you can walk away from a meal not feeling like you eaten way too much, then you know youve done well in America. We once again made our way to the Venetian, stopping for an icecream along the way. The menu showed some graphic pictures for some of the biggest sundaes I have ever seen, each with a more crazy and zany name. Dad and I settled on a single waffle cone each, and even that was a stretch to eat. you could quite literally use these waffle cones as cups and be quite sated and happy. With the strains of Justin Beiber and Christina Aguilera making its way from the dancefloor not far from the icecream place, we finally got to the Venetian and settled in for the show.

Rita Rudner was an interesting comic, one of the recent surge of observational comedians. Dad had himself a ball, as much of the topics were on marriage, relationships and women. Not having too much to relate to, I didnt have the greatest time, but hey, she had her moments. the show finished about 9:50, so we called for a final drink before we packed it in for the early night. We grabbed a quick drink from a bar, and kept our course back to Ballys. Passing the sign for the world famous $2 Nathans Hotdog for the zillionth time so far, we decided to have one for our last meal in Vegas. For their idea for a cheap hotdog, it was actually half decent. We made our way up to our room and quickly fell asleep.

Vegas has been one of the more interesting places ive visited. Many times both Dad and I just stopped for a second and had to focus just to take it all in. The place cracks us both up. A town that so greatly captures the American way cannot be found anywhere else. everywhere and everything is devoted completely to the tradition of excess. the hotels over the years get bigger and bigger, taller and taller. The high morning sun quickly dissapears into shadow as the buildings rise to cover it. No danger of sunburn in this city. Anything goes in this city. To qoute one of the oldest sayings in this city “what goes on in Vegas, stays in Vegas” except for Herpes, that shit’ll follow you forever.

Day 2- Las Vegas

17/1/2010

Well, there goes half a day. the night before, we fell into our hotel rooms, got almost beaten to death by the most heavy duty shower that you have ever seen, got into bed and the minute my head hit the pillow, I was gone. I expected dad to be up, as usual, by 9am, ready to wake me up and start our first proper day in Vegas. Boy was i wrong. A few times over the night I remember small glimpses of half consciousness, but from 11:30 pm on the 16th to 12:20 on the 17th, both dad and I were deader than a doornail. Thinking it was time for both us to crawl out of our very comfy and opulent cave to join the rest of the crazy world waiting for us outside; we threw on some clothes and made our way out.

Stepping out onto the strip was something else, i can tell you that.  Sensory overload, that’s all i can say. It was the middle of the day on a Sunday, but the place was packed to the brim with partygoers, sightseers, touts, and the occasional family, though why they are bothering beats me. You can’t really do ANYTHING in this place, unless you’re 21, so bringing a 6 year old is kind of useless. Well, actually, there are plenty of things to do, but you would have to be at least 16-17 to enjoy any of the various shows and some of the pretty awesome rollercoasters that dot the skyline. The whole place is just so utterly devoted to excess! Which is what i was kind of expecting, but you can never really prepare yourself for it fully till you’ve been there.

Walking along the strip was an arduous task in itself, but definitely a required one if you are to ever actually gain the full experience. Every few steps are met by crushing crowds and the ever present touts, selling everything from a ‘genuine’ Rolex to a girl, direct to you in 20 minutes. Plenty of beggars at that, some of them quite interesting. Some were obviously very fake. An example is the very first one that we saw. He had a little cardboard sign that explained that he had lost his wallet, hadn’t eaten in 4 days, was an ex veteran, as shown by his slightly daggy veteran costume, his dog had just died, and to top it all off, he had cancer. Why he had one of the biggest smiles on his face bemuses me. Some of the other beggars were quite entertaining. One particular man had saved up to buy a microphone, an amp, a silly costume, and was rapping for his bread. You got to admire the tenacity and balls of the guy. Needless to say, he had quite a bit of money in his hat.

Coming across a half-price ticket sign, we waited in line and bought tickets to see Drew Cares improvaganza. It wasn’t until 7:30 that night, so we went for a further walk around the strip.

We finally arrived at the planet Hollywood, our destination at the time. Dad had won a free pull of the million dollar slot machine, so we had decided to head there so that we could try our luck. Ended up winning a free drink at the casino bar. Hey, better luck next time. We went in and had a quick look around the place, but there really wasn’t much to see other than more and more casino floors. I definitely need to come back here when I’m 21.

Wanting to get a good look of the rest of Vegas, we decided to take a ride in the monorail that makes its way around most of the city. Whilst it gave some alright views for about half the trip, when it eventually made its way away from the strip and into the suburbs, we started getting some very nice views of staff car parks and brick buildings. We waited until the monorail had finished its round trip, and then got off at the MGM Grand. Our show was playing there at 7:30, so we went down onto the casino floor, found ourselves a bar, and waited. Finding some time to kill, i made time to write this.

Finally time came to make our way round to the improv-a-ganza. Making it into the show, dad decided to make his way to the toilet. Again. And again. And then again. Something to do with the 3 massive glasses of water that the bar people were plying on us. We also had multiple other drinks as well, so it makes sense. We are going out of this with screwed up stomachs but lovely clean kidneys. Getting back to the improv show. Drew Carey has certainly lost a whole lot of weight. Looks a little weird, but hey, good for him. The show was as good as I imagined it, though they didn’t pick volunteers from the nosebleed seats that we had, so I didn’t get the chance to go up on stage. The show was very funny, with some of the best improv people around on stage. I would most definitely recommend it to anyone who comes to Vegas.

After the show, we headed round the planet dailies for dinner. It was interesting to note the time, being 10 to 10 when we walked up. Who needs jetlag when you can just shift your entire existence forward two hours? The meal was adequate, though the portion size was crazy. Dad ordered an Asian chicken salad to try and get some vegies and a healthier option in him, but the portion size completely threw out any chance of getting some health out of it. My pasta was as fatty as they come, plenty of cream. Got to love it.

After that lovely meal, we decided to pack it in, heading back to the hotel for a well-deserved nap after the massive day we had just had

Here we are in L AX after what seemed a very long flight. All in all Delta Airlines seemed pretty good and everything ran smoothly. UNTIL WE HIT LAX.

Debarkation went fine and we got through customs etc quite well. then we got to baggage claim and waited, and waited, and waited. By the time our bags came through we had 30 minutes tomake our next flight, in a different terminal, needing also to check in with our bags. Of course it didn’t happen!

We stood for an hour in the line at the special service desk only to find out that it was Martin Luther King Day and that flights were full to everywhere. This was 9 o’clock in the morning and we were told that the best that they could do was 6.19 pm to Las Vegas. I said to the nice lady that I had made a point of not coming to LA as I had no interest in the place and could they give me a car to drive. Alas no!

So Sean and I got the opportunity  of bumming around the streets for 6 hours. In some ways it was okay as we went to a shopping mall at Manhatten Beach and ate, drank, shopped and generally got ourselves acclimatised. What people thought of 2 rumpled, slightly odourous and bleary-eyed Australians cracking sarckie jokes at each other in the mall I’m not sure but we enjoyed ourselves.

Discovery no. 1 - Clothes are bog cheap! Sean and I are now both owners of very nice wool jackets that should perform well when we hit the snowy parts of the US and will be great on a winters day in Adelaide. Cost for me $160 marked down to $40, cost to Sean $69 marked down from $110. Same ones in Australia would have been well over $200+.

We went to a islander themed fast food type place for lunch and encountered USA portion size. Our soft drinks came in steins that would have held 750ml. All that for about $3.50 each. If we had gone for “normal” softies ie coke etc then the cost was $2.50 for a bottomless cup - scary! Sean and I had had a snack earlier so we decided to share an entree of buffalo wings. Having never worked out exactly what they were I found that they were the meaty upper portion of the wing. Our light shared entree contained a dozen of the buffalo wings and was smothered in special sauce and accompanied by celery and carrot sticks with a mayonnaise dipping bowl. I walked away having trouble breathing as I was so full. And this was with a shared entree!

By the time 2 weeks is up I will be dead from over eating.